“The more the merrier”, it is true, but I really fancied setting foot on some place new with no one for company.
A thought of escapism always feels me desperate to run away. *sigh* I had to junk some planned of solo adventure even it is long awaited. I did not push through because of my new assign tasks at office base. Though my savings is recovering, but then I knew there will come a time I should empty it again for another worthwhile voyage. Full time work and full time weekends students do not complemented my plan for Islamic journey. I needed to prioritize and focus, and chose these so called “Deen Journey” over labor and learner student. Waiting for a time that when my work is getting well I will need to give up for some reasons that I have to take the “Deen Journey”. Although making decisions to quit for these two things that makes my daily routine so busy was not easy, but I knew that if I finally made it, I will feel a momentary peace and clarity will wash over me and I will tell myself that I did the right thing (In shaa ALLAH)
Dealing with the consequences of my decisions, however, was an entirely different story. For a time I was a total wreck. College and Office was a lot more manageable. I had nobody to rely on but I, it was my choice anyway.
Next weekend’s will be the end of our first prelim exam in second term. Prudently saying, an overflowing confidence and calmness of not studying is what feels me to be positive right now, because I knew it will not be an one hell of a ride for me and not as grueling a I was thinking, regardless that I had already encountered most of the topics years ago at STI. Well then, my nerves sucked all the physical, intellectual and emotional energy I had. Right now I feel dehydrated and badly in need of a “refill” and a tranquil “Deen Journey” seems to be the perfect refuge for my spirit.
The desire of getting away from it all as well as a personal roller-coaster traveling, makes me feel so desperate and looking forward for the moment that I will pack my clothes in my trusty Cose bag pack and head for the victory of traveling.
But for now I still find myself inside this square one writing these fantasies of traveling as I type a note on my bucket list..“Deen Journey, here I come” (In shaa ALLAH).